Your mom's so fat she can't even jump
to a conclusion.
Your mom's so fat, when she dances
the band skips.
Your mom's so fat, I have to take a bus a train and a
cab just to get on her good side.
Your mother's so fat, her clothes have stretch marks.
Your mother's so fat, she needs a watch on both arms
because she covers two time zones.
Your mother's so fat, you could slap her butt and
ride the waves.
Your mother's so fat, she needs a hula hoop to keep
her socks up.
Your mother's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant
she doesn't get a menu, she gets an estimate.
Your mother's so fat, when they used her underwear
for bungee jumping, they hit the ground.
Your mother's so fat, when she goes to a restaurant
she looks at the menu and says, "OK"!
Your mom's so fat, when she lays on the beach, people
run around yelling, "Free Willie!"
Your mom's so big, she plays marbles with planets.
Your mom's so fat, her belt size is the equator.
Your mom's so fat, she has to buy two airplane
Your mom's so fat, when she turns around they throw
her a welcome back party.
Your mom's so fat she uses a satellite dish as a
Your mom's so fat when she took her dress to the
cleaners they told her, "Sorry, we don't do curtains."
Your mom's so fat, the back of her neck looks like a
pack of franks.
Your mom's so fat, she sat on four quarters and made
Your mom's so big, when the family wants to watch
home movies they ask her to wear white.
Your mothers so fat, she was baptized at Sea World.
Your mothers so fat, people jog around her for
Your mothers so fat, she went to the movies and sat
next to everyone.
Your mothers so fat, she's on a light diet...as soon
as it gets light out she starts eating.
Your mothers so big that she sat on a rainbow and got
Your mothers so fat that when she wore an "X" jacket
a helicopter tried to land on her back.
Your mothers head is so big, it shows up on radar.
Your mothers so fat, when she went to the beach, she
was the only one that got a tan.
Your mothers so fat your bath tub has stretch marks.
Your mothers so fat, when she stepped on the scale it
said, "To be continued."
Your mothers so fat, she got a run in her jeans.
Your mothers so fat, she irons her clothes on the
Your mothers so fat, she sells shade in the summer.
Your mothers so fat, she left the house with
high-heels and came back with flip-flops.
Your mothers so fat, when I got on top of her my ears
Your mothers so fat, she influences the tides.
Your mothers so fat, when she fell over, she rocked
herself to sleep trying to get up again.
Your mothers so fat, she was baptized at Marine
Your mothers so fat, she has her own area code.
Your mothers so fat, they got her face on the Crisco
Your mothers so fat, she stepped on a scale and it
said "Sorry, we don't do live stock."
Yo mama so fat, were in her right now.
Yo mama so ugly, her mom had to tie a steak around
her neck to get the dogs to play with her.
Yo mama so ugly, when she walks down the street in
September, people say "Damn, is it Halloween already?"
Yo mama so fat, every time someone say "Kool Aid" she
bust through the wall.
Yo mama so fat, her legs are like spoiled milk -
white & chunky!
Yo mama so fat, you have to roll her in flour and
look for the wet spot to fuck her
Yo mama so fat, she put on her lipstick with a
Yo mama so fat, she broke her leg, and gravy poured
Yo mama so nasty, I called her for phone sex and she
gave me an ear infection.
Yo mama so ugly, she went into an hunted house and
came out with an application
Yo mama so ugly, when she joined an ugly contest,
they said "Sorry, no professionals."
Yo mama so ugly, her mom had to be drunk to breast
Yo mama so ugly, the government moved Halloween to
Yo mama so ugly, that if ugly were bricks she'd have
her own projects.
Yo mama so ugly, when they took her to the beautician
it took 12 hours... for a quote!
Yo mama so fat, her nickname is "DAMN"
Yo mama so fat, that she needs a sock for each toe
Yo mama so fat, she eats Wheat Thicks.
Yo mama so slutty, she could suck the chrome off a
trailer hitch ball!
Yo mama so slutty, she could suck a golf ball through
six feet of garden hose
Yo mama so poor, her face is on the front of a food
Yo mama's like a refrigerator, everyone sticks their
meat in her.
Yo momma is like a bowling ball she gets three
fingers, thrown in the gutter, and comes back for more.
Yo momma so fat, scientists have declared her ass to
be the 10th planet.
Yo momma's so stupid, she got hit by a parked car.
Your momma's so poor she can't even pay attention!
Your mamma is so fat she's on both sides of the
Your mamma is so fat when we were having sex I rolled
over 9 times and I was still on the BITCH!!!!!
Yo momma so ugly your Grandma threw her on the street
and was charged for littering.
Yo momma so fat the last time she saw 90210 was on
Yo momma so ugly, she walked into Taco Bell and
everyone ran for the border.
Yo momma is like a toilet; fat, white, and smells
like shit !!
Yo momma is like a bowling ball, gets picked up
fingered, thrown in the gutter and bitch comes back for
Your mamma is so poor she was kicking a can down the
street, asked what she was doing and she said moving.
Yo momma is like a bottle of ketchup, she gets turned
around, banged, and then she comes out slow.
Your mother is like a doorknob.... everyone gets a
Your mom is like a race car driver, she burns 50
rubbers a day.
Your momma is like a vacuum cleaner, she sucks, blows
and gets laid in the closet.
Your mothers so fat, they tie a rope around her
shoulders and drag her through a tunnel when they want
to clean it.
Yo momma's so stupid she thought a quarterback is a
Yo momma's glasses are so thick when she looks at a
map she sees people waving.
Yo momma's hair so greasy when she gets in the car
the oil light comes on.
Yo momma is a carpenter's dream...she's flat as a
board and she's never been screwed.
Yo momma is so fat she has more chins than a Chinese
Yo momma is so fat her blood type is rocky road.
Yo momma is so fat when God said let there be light,
he said move your fat butt out of the way.
Yo momma is so dumb she got hit by a park car.
Yo momma is so dumb she tripped over a cordless phone.
Yo momma is so fat she uses a mattress as a tampon.
Yo momma is so fat she put on a pair of Guess Jeans
and the answer popped out.
Yo momma's so fat, she irons her clothes on the drive
Yo momma's glasses are so thick, when she looks at a
map she sees people waving.
Yo momma's so fat, she was floating in the ocean and
Spain claimed her for the new world!
Yo momma's so ugly, when you look up "ugly" in the
dictionary, there's a picture of her!
Yo momma's so short, she does back flips under the
Yo momma is like a shotgun, one cock and she'll blow
Yo momma's so fat she can't even fit in the chat
Yo Momma's so fat she gets her toenails painted at
Lucky's Auto Body.
Your momma's armpits so stink she put on Right Guard
and it went left.
Your momma's like a hardware store, 5 cents a screw.
Your momma's house is so small, when you buy a large
pizza you have to go outside and eat it
Your momma's so hairy they filmed Gorillas in the
Mist in her shower!
Yo momma's got more mileage then a New York city
Yo momma's face is so pimply that her tears need a
4x4 to get down her face.
Yo momma's so loose, she jerks herself with the fat
end of a baseball bat.
Yo momma so poor when I rang the doorbell she stuck
her head out the window and yelled ding dong.
Yo momma so stupid, she took a spoon to the Super
Yo momma's so poor, she has to hang toilet paper out
Yo momma's so poor, when I stepped on a lit match in her
house, she yelled "Who turned off the furnace"!
Yo momma's so poor, she can't get rid of the roaches in
her house 'cause they pay half the rent!
Yo momma's feet are so crusty, when she walks on a
wooden floor, it sounds like she's tap dancing.
Yo momma's like a pie, everybody gets a piece.
Yo momma's so fat that when she asked for a water
bed, they threw a blanket over the pacific ocean.
Yo momma's like a "Happy Meal" small, cheap and
Your momma's so fat, your family pictures have to be
taken by a satellite!
Your momma's like the village bicycle, everybody gets
Yo momma's got a party in her mouth tonight, and
Yo momma's so short, she can sit on a dime and swing
Yo mama so skinny her pyjamas only have one stripe.
Your mommas so ugly the army doesn't use guns any
more, they use her picture.
You're mama is so poor that she chases the garbage
truck with a shopping list.
Yo momma is so fat she caught a flesh-eating virus...
and that was three years ago.
Yo momma so short she can hang glides Doritos.
Your mother is so fat she asked for a water bed and
they put a blanket over the ocean.
Yo Momma's so fat, when she walks by the TV I miss a
season of Friends.